by Matalie Connors & Co.

Dragons are cool.
One time, when I
was a dagron, I got a
jeorb at Denny’s and did
all my laundry. Never did
that as a duck.
I heard that dragons
can fly so high up into
the sky that when you
see shooting stars
it is actually dragons
ejaculating. That’s what
Peter told me.
I have, like, this
little ceramic dagron
that my cousin gave me
that sits on a crystal ball.
I once threw it like a
shot-put and New Orleans
Christian Bale tried to
kill all the dragons
before they took control of the Stock Exchange
I heard that shoes
are Chuck Norris’s only
Dagrons are really smart
and they can speak
all the languages of the
world: all the human languages,
all the animal languages, and
their best friends are squirrels.
They roast their nuts.
Dragons can make toasters
out of coconuts, they
just don’t want to.
The only thing you learn about
construction sites is you have to
wear the right shoes. Dragons.